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Monas yang selalu kucinta

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How to Ghibli?

That time of the year, again. Why can't life be more like Ghibli's aesthetics? It has been a while for me to be in my 30s, and soon I will be turning 40. What will one expect when one turns into a 40-year-old woman?  Why can't life be like Ghibli's slice of life feature films? Why can't we find ideal love like in those movies? 3 years ago today I still can't imagine that I finally found out that my (back then) spouse was a serial cheater, a swinger, and an avid liar. My whole life was crumbled, and my mind went crazy, like literally mad (will tell this someday when I'm ready). And briefly after that, I met a random guy, got married again in such a short time, and have a baby not long after. Back then, no one really cares about how I feel inside, my messed up mind is still there up until now. So, what to do? Seiji and Shizuku in Whisper of the Heart (1995) Source: Whisper of the Heart (https://www.cinemaescapist.com/2014/11/whisper-of-the-heart/ & https:/...

obrolan setengah dua pagi

"Hey, kayanya mouthwash kita cepet habis ya...??" "Eh,iya...aku baru aja mo ngajakin kamu beli lagi..." "Lho? kirain kamu yang ngabisin..." "Lah??" .... (Kami berdua terdiam) Terlintas langsung beberapa bulan yang lalu, saat teman saya itu baru beberapa hari tinggal di kosan ini. Hp-nya raib, hanya beberapa menit saat dia tinggal mandi! Tersangkanya? Well, ada satu makhluk ini--bawaan dari anak kos baru juga. Entah dia sodaranya, ato pacarnya, kami ga tau. Tapi yang jelas dia tinggal tiap hari di situ, di kamar yang jelas-jelas disewa untuk satu orang itu. Dan well, siang hari, pas cewenya itu kerja, dia suka bawa cewe lain ke kamar... ( what the??? ) dan gelagatnya mencurigakan (ga kaya berteman...) Hmm.. terlepas dari gaya sok Don Juan or Casanova kacangan dari makhluk itu (yang ganteng juga ga, kaya apalagi, tapi klepto and ngepul kaya lokomotif jaman jebot), dia seenaknya make kamar mandi yang saya share bareng temen saya itu (di sini 2 k...

#9: Happiness

  Day 9 of 30 days writing challenge. Happiness I am everything but happy right now, I'm sorry. Not really in the mood to talk about happiness so today we'll be off topic. Not happy now. Just heard a heartbreaking news about work-related stuff, and the feel of rejection is similar with the one that I felt during my apprenticeship year, when I heard that my Studio Coordinator gave me an E so I have to do another year again (8 hours credits do it another year, he hated me gut and my window shape , so yeah I'm screwed). Always thought that drawing buildings isn't my thing, but I stuck there nonetheless. Come to think of it, my undergrad years were full of sh*t and sadness, there's always this lecturer that hated your design. And you felt like crap). I cried back then, on the rooftop of RRI building where my project management took place. I'm not always bright, I've been through hell. And it's not sweet. Anyways, I'm not unfamiliar with this kind of f...