Skip to main content

Expect the unexpected

Being pregnant while you're on your late thirties wasn't something I really planned for. I was really skeptical before in terms of both my physical and mental condition and not really expecting this unexpected event. 

But there she was, there in my belly. After a failed marriage I found a decent guy, with all of his imperfections and mine we weave our destiny together and God gave us our miraculous girl. 

My mother told me how she was already planned on trying to get me to do the IVF but hesitate to do so since I wasn't really good at controlling emotions and stuff. And she was quite right since it's always been an issue and still, up until now. For our family, especially my mother, me having a girl is like an absolute must, if one might say so too. As me growing older and people start questioning (I hate how busy body people can be, while fact I spent most of my time avoiding people or meddling into their lives), some even said to my mom to get me an adopted child. It's hurtful, those suggestions, and I was lucky I was filtered from them. 

And yet here I am, with a one month old girl, already she spent most of her first three weeks in hospital. If you know how useless can one feel is when she saw her child got into an E.R, not yet a month, with an I.V attached to her arms. I'm not trying to be dramatic, but it was dramatic. And she was nearly lost her life, because of me. Why? I can't keep up with her needs of breast milk. 

If one can say what's the hardest thing to do in this world is : bringing another human into this world. It wasn't easy, before. It is still not easy after. And the mother always get that look and blame. The fact that so many people pushed new mothers nowadays to exclusively lactate gives pressure to me and the toll was right there. She, my baby, was dehydrated. And the thoughts of giving her formula or other's milk wasn't really thought of because everyone kept on pushing me to breastfeed,...and there was barely none. It was devastating. I condemn people that judge mothers who give their child formula. You fxxxers don't know what they've been through. Try walk in their  shoes before judging or commenting. 

And after the hospital disposal, the drama continues. My girl was suspected to have a low level of thyroid. I was, again, devastated. I tried so hard not to share anything on my social media (this blog might be the only channel I will be updating regarding this--knowing it's like a journal no one's gonna read). Will get another test for her this week and I pray to God that she's okay.


This week has so many sleepless night, I am weary to the bone. I hardly can do anything else instead of nurturing. 


Wish me luck. Wish my girl luck. 



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How to Ghibli?

That time of the year, again. Why can't life be more like Ghibli's aesthetics? It has been a while for me to be in my 30s, and soon I will be turning 40. What will one expect when one turns into a 40-year-old woman?  Why can't life be like Ghibli's slice of life feature films? Why can't we find ideal love like in those movies? 3 years ago today I still can't imagine that I finally found out that my (back then) spouse was a serial cheater, a swinger, and an avid liar. My whole life was crumbled, and my mind went crazy, like literally mad (will tell this someday when I'm ready). And briefly after that, I met a random guy, got married again in such a short time, and have a baby not long after. Back then, no one really cares about how I feel inside, my messed up mind is still there up until now. So, what to do? Seiji and Shizuku in Whisper of the Heart (1995) Source: Whisper of the Heart (https://www.cinemaescapist.com/2014/11/whisper-of-the-heart/ & https:/...

#11: Siblings

 Day 11 of 30 days writing challenge. Siblings You either love 'em unconditionally or hate them occasionally . They share the same blood as you, they're your first friends. And it's not uncommon that you spent your days fighting and quarrelling with them at day and get along again at night. Your parents still mad at you but you already reconciliate with them. A brother and a sister As a middle child, I always stuck in between. My brother and my sister both have strong personalities. When they're fighting it's like a fierceful battle between Dragon Slaying Sabre VS Heavenly Sword --minus maybe they're both a bit antagonistic , none really chivalry. Brother My big bro is an amazing abstract learner. Why I said "abstract"? It's because he never did enjoy the typical learning practices in formal education. But when we're younger, different methods weren't there for children with superb or different qualities. Anyways, he's an avid lear...

Ikhtiar

Ingin sekedar berbagi cerita tentang perjalanan hidup sampai mendapatkan yang dinanti-nanti.  Alhamdulillah dua tahun slowdown karena pandemi membawa berkah. Setahun setelah menikah, kami dianugerahi seorang putri yang sangat kami sayangi. Perjalanan  mendapatkannya bisa dibilang tidak mudah. Akumulasi semua pengalaman sebelumnya, banyak rintangan yang dihadapi. Namun syukurlah Allah memberikan amanah kepada kami sekeluarga.  Berkah Habatussaudah Ternyata hadits Rasulullah tentang keutamaan Habatussaudah atau jinten hitam sebagai obat segala penyakit* benar adanya. Jinten hitam ini adalah faktor pembeda utama, selain suami yang sangat sabar dan waktu di rumah yang lebih panjang karena work from home (wfh) . Setelah menikah dengan suami yang penyabar ini, saya disarankan oleh adik saya untuk berikhtiar dengan cara mengkonsumsi 7 (tujuh) butir Habatussaudah/jinten hitam yang sudah disangrai dan madu setiap hari. Cukup tujuh butir, tidak perlu banyak-banyak karena Habatuss...