#24: Lesson Learned

 Day 24 of 30 days writing challenge

Lesson Learned

As my challenge skipped a day (yesterday was frantic), I'm trying to continue on.

There was a huge protest goin' against the new bill. There's also a deadline of the new job--but old job actually--that was quite depressing. I went to the office knowing that it's going to be a chaos right in front of my office in the heart of our capital. Lucky I got home prior to the clash.

What should I've learnt?

During these past few weeks the pressure from work is tremendous. They said that they have less position than people applying for it, and we have to compete in order to stay in our current position.

Well, I'm on what we Indonesian said "Bagaikan telur di ujung tanduk," or in English, walking on thin ice. I was assigned as a group coordinator, and it really gets in my nerves. People in my group are like s××× and ungrateful brats. They're like a bunch of obnoxious people with no sense of logic, and no sense of humanity whatsoever. True that humans are at their worst on pressure, and these people are not really nice people to begin with.

Not that I'm talking sh×t 'bout them, no. But this is actually not the first time I've to deal with their antics. I know, I'm not a perfect person anyway, but least people can do is be a decent human being and appreciate people.

I'm having a hard time trusting people, and these people actually not helping in mending my trust to humans.

Actually talking about taking a year or two off from work because I'm so tired off all these nonsense. My blood pressure rose up high this week, I got severe headache everyday. It's like I'm having too much. I even thinking I need to get my old medicine back. I'm so so tired. So tired until I can't even do my job well. I still got two pending urgent assignments, more pending assignments with a nagging untrustworthy partner telling me it's okay to go to remote places during pandemic for work, one wrecked coordinating duty (this crappy me doubted everyfuckinday by those scums), recaps for last year, recaps for this year, and so many bills to pay. My mind is full of these crap I can't even rest. 

I'm so tired.

What  I learned from this? 

Will all these pain and troubles be paid-off?