Ameru's blog

Glow Goth Glittering Gusts Golden Grittier of Grumbling Guts Gamble the Growth of Gay-light Git Gives me Gists of Growing Gee- Wees G for G as G for Glad Gift and as Gas, drifted pass G will be G Gorgeous as can be, as G is for me  G will always be

Don't care what your smell When you're not taking a shower for two days For me, you'll always ring my bell And pretty as flowers in Mays Though the chords would never entwined, The songs would never be sung, The melody stays blurry-unwind As the rhytm might forever stays young Just a drip of your words Turned my my inside out "Nothing really..." crunched into thousand swords, Gunned down all my defenseless sought Gratitude, solitude Remembrance of picturesque loveliness, Only in my mind the feeling's magnitude While i'm in a trance of grotesque sadness Ah, unanswered melody Gradient of my failing heart... Though your reply brings remedy Still this painting is not an art

You are a song in my heart That haunted my every night Like a gusted wind That makes my insides spin You took over my mind Like the monks inside a shrine Praying for salvation from the lust Of a guilt or a trust? Why should someone be barred With this so-called juxtaposed, Remedy of elegy, Of a love-dope or a clergy? 'Cause all i can see, All I can be Is as a wondering bee inside your honey-filled tree? This war is endless, Thus acting surrender would be useless, since none of these really mattered If my heart would eventually shattered Not that I objected, Not that I care being ejected, After all, there's a beauty in any unrequited tragedy, that would forever be kept in my memory

Jadi, suatu ketika saat saya baru kembali dari bepergian, saya mendapatkan berita bahwa saya menjadi pelaku alias tersangka entah merebut atau mendekati (?) seseorang yang tadinya dekat dengan orang yang ternyata lebih gila dari saya ini. Saya selama ini merasa sudah paling gila sedunia karena sering berilusi dan berimajinasi yang kelewat kreatif hingga kadang saya sulit membedakan mana nyata mana impian (pernah sekali waktu saya melihat kura-kura terbang di langit-langit kosan saya, dan saya yakini itu nyata (!)...). Nah, ternyata si psycho ini menyebarkan 'pertanyaan' dan 'pernyataan' ke orang-orang, apakah benar saya "mendekati" (?)mantan(?) -->saya kasih tanda tanya karena ada kemungkinan mereka ternyata ga pernah jadian!<--- nya yang sama sekali bukan tipe saya. Dan gilanya lagi saya ga single, saya aktif berpacaran setiap hari lewat skype, fesbuk, dan mesenjer2 apapun itu dengan sang pacar, yang di negara tetangga. Alangkah ajaibnya apabila say...

life is just a big bad joke created by God while He's bored... if it's not, there should be more than 7 billion kinds of rationality, morality, freedom, and justice... but then again, ... ... why should life focused on humans? while we, acting sooo "smart", done more harm than any good to this world and even a single dictator of some rotten invasive country could done massive destruction to this world.. what kind of justice is that? "Equity" is such a lip-service thingy... truth is, life is never equal. Just like a pan-full of pizza... you can't really know the taste unless you try it. You can never really tell, did you get the slice as equally in portion as others'? It would tasted better if you eat with friends... (and thus the size of your slice won't matter)...but, what are friends to you? What are you to your friends? What's the use of friends if you only think of yourselves while you're with them and you never think ...

I suddenly awaken from my idle sleep, hiding out from another 300 words that I have to finish for tomorrow's essay. And then came to my mind this graph, asymptotic graph of friendship. y = 1/x An asymptot curve of y=1/x, where: y=quality or quantity of the relationship x=time You see, friendship, at least mine, always ended up in an asymptotic period where you and your friend(s) are hardly even seen each other, nor care about each other. For example, take this so called loyal friend of mine. We were very close from kindergarden up until junior high. Whenever there was me, there was her by my side. But when we parted school, our friendship did part as well. Well, it didn't end like totally zero--although tends to be approaching it, thus made the relationship asymptotic to zero. At the beginning, sure we were bonded to each other very closely, but in the end, that relationship ceased near to nothing. What about love relationships? Well, I suppo...